


Promises are made to be broken

by sick_and_tired_of_this



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Broken Promises, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Drugs, Heavy Angst, How Do I Tag, Hurt No Comfort, I Made Myself Cry, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Inarizaki, Love Confessions, M/M, Pain, Past Drug Use, Promises, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 04:14:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30015978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sick_and_tired_of_this/pseuds/sick_and_tired_of_this
Summary: Suna did a lot of bad decisions in his life, Osamu let him, both breaking their promises.But that's okay. Because promises are made to be broken and made again and again. Right?
Relationships: Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou
Kudos: 5





	Promises are made to be broken

**Author's Note:**

> I'm @ mixed_aesthetics from wattpad lol the story is also uploaded there

Another flashback. How much until those end? Rintaro was in a state of ecstasy. No expectations, no pressure. He sat at the floor of his bathroom giggling at a funny thought here and there. Naive. Stupid. 

It was one time. He promised himself it was gonna be only once. But he found himself again and again in the same state. He regretted that he couldn't keep himself from doing bad decisions. He never wanted it. It was all because of him. The guy that if it wasn't that he was already found dead from an accidental overdose in heroin he would've killed him himself. Rintaro never wanted this. He hit his head on the wall. Naive. Stupid. 

He thought he could save him but he ended up getting dragged in the same hole as him. He wanted to help him but he ended up like him. He promised himself it was gonna be only once just to keep up with him. The it became two times. Three. Four. He had lost the count after. Naive. Stupid. 

He did the mistake to cut off his friends because they advised him to cut off the person he thought he could save. How dumb could he be? He thought of the first time he smoked weed. He wasn't intending to. He thought it was just nicotine. The whole time he was latched on him and they were both laughing and making theories high off the real world. He thought that he was in love. Naive. Stupid. 

He remembered the first time he got his hands on LSD. It was the very same night he screamed at Oikawa Tooru to leave the club because intentionally getting in drugs would be much worst than talking to your best friend about your problems. Such a hypocrite wasn't he? He tried to remember what happened to Oikawa... Oh right, he got a successful life with a good husband and a secure place in Argentina's national team. He wished there was someone to yell at him before the first time he tried to smoke crack... Wasn't that when the man he thought to love the most convinced him to run away with him, without leaving a sign about his disappearance to anyone? Also the last time he thought he was gonna see his friends... The twins... Kita-san and Aran-san... He knew he was making a mistake when he agreed. Naive. Stupid. 

He tried to remember all of the times he would have a happy moment and would think about them instead.... Osamu... What was he thinking leaving them? Now the one he falsely thought he loved is dead leaving a hole in his heart, the thought of drugs making him nauseous and not being able to even eat properly... He thought of the grey haired Miya... He had an onigiri store of his own now didn't he? At least that's what Atsumu said on national TV when he was asked about his brother... That's what Osamu said too... He looked down at his hands. 

Another flashback. The guy he sacrificed everything gently holding his head between his shaking hands. It was that one time they thought he had overdosed. He was scared he was gonna loose him. He did eventually. But that didn't stop him from seeking out for heroin. Even if it was the poison that killed his lover. It didn't stop him from making cocktails or buying the most sketchy ones he could find.... 

He had no purpose anymore so why not just give it up? Everyone hated him anyway. He thought of the times they would laugh at his jokes. Was he actually funny or did they just laughed along so that they would not offend him? He didn't expect them to be real with him, when he was the biggest liar out of all of them. Latching onto the guy that dragged him into destruction, hoping to get over his own feelings... He never truly loved him despite sacrificing his chance of a good life when he took between his fingers his first blunt. Naive. Stupid. 

He never meant to let himself slip. He never meant to go that far. He wanted a good life like the rest of his friends. 

Another flashback. Those started getting tiring. It was him landing a punch on Shiratorizawa's middle blocker, Tendō Satori. He had asked him how much for a line. He didn't punch him because he wanted the line for himself or his lover. It was because he promised that he would never allow someone else to fall in the same pit as him. The guilt would eat him alive. Like it did every night because of his failure in saving his already lost lover. Naive. Stupid. 

A white flash behind his closed eyes. That reminded him from the white flash that had him semi-blinded when he slapped Nekoma's setter, Kozume Kenma's hands away from the blunt that was passing around in a small college party he somehow found himself in. He wished someone had insisted the way he did and saved him the way he wanted to save his beloved one or helped other acquittances by telling them off when they still could. Naive. Stupid. 

He opened his eyes again. His body were on an unhealthy level of underweight. That's what the doctor said. They were gonna release him nevertheless. He hoped that Osamu wouldn't come to pick him up. Stupid. Naive. Another flashback. Please make it to be the last one. He was sitting alone in a corner. He was crying and sobbing. He was loosing consciousness. He realised that the symptoms weren't because it was a new drug he hadn't tried yet. It was because he overdosed. He didn't want that. He didn't want to die. He wanted to live. He wanted to be happy dammit. If he hadn't believed he could save him just so he can run away from his own feelings none of this would have happened. That's not the end he deserved. Completely conscious sobbing and choking paralyzed in a corner of a shady college party for the last years. He heard someone calling his name. With his last powers he looked up to see Osamu's worried face. Why was he worried? It didn't really matter... He was probably hallucinating... He wasn't. He woke up in a hospital bed. Osamu visited him once. He told him he was gonna get released soon. Naive. Stupid. 

He snapped out of his flashback. The doctor came in to inform him that he could leave. He just nodded. Got up, almost mechanical and wore the same outfit he wore at the party. It looked cleaned. Osamu probably got in the trouble to clean it so he would look presentable. As presentable as someone so mentally wrecked as he was at the moment could look at least. He walked out of the hospital. Him being a burden to Osamu was the last thing he wanted. He always hated being a burden to someone. 

He took a taxi and asked to get to the bridge he used to go on casual dates on with his deceased lover, hoping he still had the money from that dreaded party night to pay the driver. He was right, he did, after all he didn't manage to actually use them back there. After paying the taxi he made his way to the rail of the bridge. He climbed on it after he saw the car drive away. It was peaceful. He remembered their last date there before he was informed about the man's he swore to save death. They were playing and dancing around, laughing at their illusion of happiness. Naive. Stupid. 

He heard someone calling his name. Risking to fall off the rail he completely turned his body around. It was Osamu. So he was actually gonna attempt to pick him up? "Rin get down, Rin please get down" the calmer Miya twin called in distress.

He could only chuckle. Should he get down? Nah. He had the right to be selfish after sacrificing all he had for one man. "Hey 'Samu long time no see" he nodded at him in a greeting. "Rin... What happened... The doctor said it was heroin overdose... You said... You said you would never..." The face on the person he was trying to deny all these years his love for broke his heart in a million pieces. He was a horrible person wasn't he? That's why he was here anyway. Make everyone a favour. Getting rid of the trash. "Hey 'Samu... I love you... I always loved you... I was trying to run away from my feelings... It wasn't your fault... I never intended it to go that far... But at this point I'm doing everyone a favour... Hey 'Samu? Remember our promise?" 

Their promise... A last flashback... First year Osamu and Rintaro making the promise to always take care of eachother... To always have eachothers back. No matter what. 

"I broke our promise 'Samu... I'm sorry... I love you..." He took a step back to meet the nothingness. His eyes widened as he felt a hand grabbing his leg, his force taking down with him the person that grabbed him. Before he realised it, Osamu was holding him. 

"I broke our promise too Rin.. promises are made to be broken so they will be made again and again" Osamu smiled gently kissing his forehead. "I love you more that you can imagine" Rintaro's eyes watered.

"I'm just a naive stupid man... Why would you do that?" Osamu's eyes were now starting to burn from the realisation of death that was to come too. "Because you're also brave and selfless... You're not stupid... You just made a few mistakes, like humans do... Hold onto me love this is gonna hurt" Was the last thing before Rintaro felt a bone crashing pain through his body. 

Oh wait. It was actually his bones crushing and turning into mush. The force they landed with actually managed to do that. His consciousness started leaving his mind as he gave a last tug on the man he actually loved more than anything in his life even when he tried to run away from the feeling. The same man that was now cold dead in his hands as he left his last breath. They didn't hit the river. They hit the ground beside it. The sight was ugly he knew. He pitied the person that would find them. Or maybe they wouldn't. But he was with the person he loved the most. It was gonna be okay. His eyes fluttered as he choked on his own blood. He promised himself that it would never get that far. But promises are made to be broken just to be made again and again, right? "Right" he heard Osamu's voice in his head. 

He smiled. They didn't have to end like this but they did. There was nothing left to do than promise themselves that they would keep from then on the promise they couldn't keep. Until they broke it again. And made it again. And again. Because that's what promises are for.


End file.
